An Affirmation
There are periods in one’s life when uncertainty and doubt about one’s paths and actions seem to take center stage of everything one does. You may work towards a goal–in career, in life–and wonder whether all of your dedication and work has been for nothing.
But, when one receives an answer, a positive answer, to some of those questions, one can not but be filled with not only joy, but with relief.
Let me tell you a story.
In 2007, I was invited to be a guest composer and performer at the Omnibus Composers Laboratory in Tashkent, Uzbekistan. This was my first (of many since) journeys to Central Asia. I didn’t know what to expect. Living in Russia at the time and speaking to Russians about their former Soviet comrades, I heard nothing but arrogance and dismissal, “why would you want to go there?”, they asked, “there is nothing there but uneducated masses and dust!”
How wrong they were.
I was a guest of the Omnibus Ensemble–the only contemporary music ensemble in all Central Asia–and the Ilkhom Theater, which was the only venue for free speech (supported, and protected, heavily by Western powers, mind you). Both were fantastic, professional, and top-notch.
The Theater’s founder, an American named Mark Weill, had just been murdered days before my arrival. The word on the street was that it was a ‘government job’, trying to force the Theater’s closure, thereby ending any venue for free speech. One has to realize that Uzbekistan is considered one of the most, if not the most, oppressive country in the world. If you have read the post on my visit there in February 2009, you would’ve gotten a glimpse into some of the extents this government will go to keep control.
But that isn’t this story.
This story is about a wonderfully talented young composer, Lily Ugay.
Lily was one of the composers–and at 17, by far the youngest–in attendance at the Omnibus Composers Laboratory. She was given by the Laboratory’s director a very honorable–and frightening–distinction for a young composer: she had to write a piece for me to premier.
You have to understand the situation here. This is a young female composer in a male-dominated Islamic society in a horribly oppressive regime that has to not only write a new piece for an internationally known American soloist, but to also have it torn apart in master class after master class by her peers, her teachers, and yes, by me…on top of that, her father had just passed away.
Well, guess what? She did just fine.
So much so in fact that I really wanted to help her. Her career choices were, needless to say, limited in Uzbekistan. In these countries, they are in a vacuum: they have so little interaction with the outside world. Their writing and playing levels, although decent and even excellent for the region, were generations behind the standards in the West…she eventually got this, and through our interaction and my continued mentoring (via email, mostly) she became determined to study in the West.
So…I connected her with my friends and colleagues here in the US, including my former teacher Chinary Ung at UCSD. Scholarship money is very hard to come by for composers in undergraduate school, and money is practically impossible to find for an international student–grad school is different, but undergrad…very unlikely. Chinary and the composition faculties at Oberlin, New England Conservatory (my alma mater), Curtis, and the Manhattan School of Music were all very impressed, but money couldn’t be found.
She did, however, get many invitations to come as a grad student. Well, that’s all fine and dandy, but what happens in the four years between? She decided to stay in Uzbekistan and attend the State Conservatory, even though she had been taking courses there for years–it was free.
But she was determined to keep trying–she continued to study both composition and piano beyond expectations, and even became the pianist for the Omnibus Ensemble–which leads me to today.
I received an email from Lily on my Blackberry this morning. She just received notice that she was given a Woodruff Award (full scholarship plus stipend) to study piano at Columbus State University in Georgia (ours, not the one in the Caucuses) to study with a Van Cliburn winning Russian pianist. She was coming to the U.S., and thanked me for making her believe that everything was possible.
My reaction was a bit surprising…I was standing in the middle of Starbucks, weeping, and muttering “I saved one, I saved one…”
But I didn’t, really. Once the hysteria subsided–I believe much to the pleasure of my fellow Starbucks customers–and I started breathing somewhat normally again, I changed my thoughts. No, I didn’t save her; she saved herself, by herself, with her own power and determination. I merely opened her to the possibilities, but that is more than enough for my affirmation.
Is this what a proud parent fells like? Considering the fact that my lineage will most likely be carried on–Platonically, mind you–through my house plants, I will probably never find out. But, it’s more like the warmth you feel when you know that someone who had no choices, now has a future of their own creation. Moving from the worst possible situation to the country that is ripe with endless possibilities. She saved herself…
…I’m still weeping as I write this; mostly uncontrollably…
Thank you,
Demetrius
Me and Lily, 2007
Azerbaijan
To continue my latest travel adventure:
So, I leave Dushanbe on May 14 on one of the most round-about flight-paths anyone is bound to embark on. Dushanbe to Baku is not very far; there is only one country (Turkmenistan) and the Caspian Sea between them (just about 1000 miles). One would think that there would be direct flights between capitol cities in the region…nope…not unlike when I traveled from Sofia (Bulgaria) to Belgrade (Serbia), when I had to go through Milan (and I calculated later that I could’ve taken the train directly in less time), the trek from Dushanbe to Baku took me basically in the shape of a giant cursive ‘e’ across Eurasia. Dushanbe to Riga to Moscow to Baku…four times the distance…in one day, mind you…
Needless to say, I was tired when I arrived in Baku…more tiring was passport control–actually, let me take a step or two back here. I knew, yes knew, that I was going to have issues with both luggage and visa/passport control in each stop…and I was right! Leaving Dushanbe, I was informed that there was a luggage fee for checked baggage (neither I nor the U.S. Embassy in Baku knew this when the tickets were purchased, so I had to go out of line to pay at a different window; luckily, they took dollars; when I did this leaving Baku, they made me exchange dollars back to Azeri manat, and go through security all over again), and proceeded to my gate–oh, I also have to say that luckily, LUCKILY, I hired a specialist through the Embassy to expedite me through passport and security in Dushanbe, otherwise I never would’ve have made my plane since I had to battle hundreds of angry migrant workers…
Riga: “Where are you going?”; “Moscow”; “Moscow? Where is your Russian visa?” “I’m transferring in Moscow to go to Baku”; “You need a Russian visa! This is a big problem!”; “No, I don’t…I am going through the International terminal, so I don‘t step on Russian soil…there is no problem”; “Are you sure?” “Yes. There is no problem”; “Where is your Azerbaijan visa?”; I don’t have one yet, I’ll get it at the Baku Airport”; “You need an Azeri visa! This is a big problem!”; “No, I can get one at the airport, this is how it works for U.S. and most European countries’ citizens”; “Are you sure?” “Yes. There is no problem.”; “You’re sure about all of this?”; “Yes…if they deport me back here, I come right to you and apologize”…then through security again because they don’t trust you coming from Central Asia…
Moscow: “Where are you going?”; “Baku”; “Baku? Where is your Azeri visa? This is a big problem!” (you see where this is going, yes?)…actually, at this point, I showed a copy of my invitation from the US Embassy in Baku (which they took; luckily, I made like 12 copies because of this probability). And it being Russia, you have to go though security a couple more times, because they believe that they do a much better job than Riga or any other country in the West.
Baku: In the airport, you see a sign that says “Do Not Purchase Visa Until You Go To Passport Control”. Long line at Passport Control. At Passport control, they told me that I needed to purchase a visa…no kidding…go back to that line, pay for the visa in American dollars, and wait for them to write it out…by hand! Then…back in line for Passport Control, again…and they stamp my passport on the very last page, where no stamps or visas are supposed to go…almost, but not quite, a problem when I left.
The main question I got from security when leaving the airport was “where are you from?”; “The United States”; “No…where are you from?”; “Um…Boston?”; “No…where are your people from?”; “Ah! My family is from Greece”; “Greece. That’s OK. You can go”. It is very important to Azeris to know your ancestry for two reasons: the first, they define you and how they react to you by your ethnicity; secondly, they want to see if there is any chance that you may have blood relations to their enemies…most notably Armenia. More on this later.
Azerbaijan. There are two things that I will remember forever about Azerbaijan. The first, and foremost, is that these are probably, en masse, the kindest, friendliest, most hospitable people I have ever met. Considering that I tend to travel in countries where hospitality is of utmost importance, this is saying a lot. The other thing that I will always remember is that these people are, without any shadow of a doubt, en masse, the worst drivers I have ever had the utmost fear in encountering…Italy, Greece, Russia, China, even other Central Asian countries…none of them compare to the absolute chaos I experienced on the roads of Baku and the regions…people crossing each other at high speeds, stopping randomly on high-speed roads, going the opposite way down highways…absolutely amazing…I was told by my host Brent Maier of the US Embassy that you have to think like a school of fish: go where the vast majority go, and you’ll be fine, even if it goes against every driving instinct that you may have…otherwise, you’ll crash into someone…Also, cars have the right of way; most of the accidents involve pedestrians in the wrong place at the wrong time…
Baku is a modern city, built with oil money. It’s the only former Soviet city that I have seen where all of the ‘Sovietness’ has been completely bled out of it. You really have no idea that this was part of the Soviet Union 20 years ago–high-rise offices and exclusive hotels surround revitalized Old City charm…and it’s more expensive than NYC, if you can imagine. Outside Baku center is a different, well hidden, story, but the main city itself is a Mecca of wealth.
My work in Azerbaijan was completely supported and organized by the U.S. Embassy in Baku, and the Cultural Affairs Officer Brent Maier. There were no ‘major’ (for lack of a better term) performances here, only lecture/performances, master classes, and outreach. I would’ve liked a big performance, but considering all of the logistics involved and also the time of year, this would’ve been very difficult to properly organize…that’s fine, I was happy to do what I did, but they owe me a big one for next time 
Although I say this every time after a project like this, I will repeat myself: I am always taken by the absolute joy and happiness these audiences have for performers, most especially those (like me) who made the effort to cross half the Globe to perform for them. They most especially love American music and culture. I was honored with the fact that I was the first American musician to ever travel and perform in the Azerbaijan regions. The audiences and hosts were so incredibly giving and appreciative. It’s funny, I don’t think it mattered what I played, as long as I played. My concerts here, by the way, were very conservative–I basically played jazz standards and popular tunes (by myself) and improvised on them. Let me rephrase this: it was conservative in the fact that I was playing recognizable tunes, at least for an American (Somewhere Over The Rainbow, Amazing Grace, Paper Moon, Sophisticated Lady, etc.; you get the idea) not in the fact that I was playing these by myself and producing melody, harmony, improvisation, rhythm, and percussion, mostly at the same time. I had only the alto sax with me. Alto is the smallest, most flexible instrument that I can travel with, especially for jazz and improvisation concerts. I was going to bring a flute, as well, but decided against it literally the night before I left for Central Asia. I find tenor sax much more flexible for such things, but it can be difficult to travel with (most especially on small, domestic flights in these regions where there is a weight and space issue), and soprano, although small (but a longer case) is not very flexible in this regard, so alto it is.
Note: there will be a blog in the very near future about my instruments and what roles I use them for–this is because I have had numerous questions to this topic from both students and professionals throughout my travels.
Now, as I mentioned, my concerts here centered around outreach and education. Because of this, basically everything I did took place in an educational center or institution; the only event that wasn’t was when I was an invited guest at the Baku Jazz Center and played with the top local jazz musicians (which was fun–it’s basically a big club). I used an interpreter on many occasions, but I also had the pleasure of presenting in schools/centers with strong English language programs.
Because of the nature of what I was doing, I had both the support and distrust of the Azeri Government. This may seem like a contradiction, but it’s not really–allow me to explain: Azerbaijan has had a very interesting history this last century. Once it gained independence from the Ottoman Empire, it created the short-lived Azerbaijan Democratic Republic, which was the first democracy in the Muslim world, and even had universal suffrage a year BEFORE the U.S. did (them 1919, us 1920). It was a very progressive nation, until it was swallowed up by the Soviet Union. Now, after the fall of the Soviet Union, the country made an attempt at going back to its democratic status–again, this was short-lived due to a number of reasons (including conflicts with certain neighbors), and power went to a man named Heydar Aliyev, who was a high-ranking official in the now defunct Soviet Army. To make a long story short, Azerbaijan followed the path of other Central Asian states (although it is technically Europe) and created a presidency that is for all intent and purpose, a king. The difference here is that the Azeri loved (and still love) Aliyev. There are monuments, posters, plaques, streets, statues, buildings, everything…you name it…named after Aliyev. He was in the Azeri’s eyes the man who brought strength and pride back to them. His son (whom, I gather, is but a shade of his father) is now president. To establish his power and legitimacy, he continues to build monuments to his father. Other kings…er…I mean ‘presidents’…of the other countries post their own faces everywhere. Now, a few months back there was a Washington Post article that criticized the current Azeri president’s family for their spending habits; since then, U.S./Azeri relations have been worsening. Now, understand that the Azeris far prefer the U.S. to Russia, but they do try and keep a balance since Georgia is so pro-U.S. and Armenia so pro-Russia. And also remember that their biggest ally, Turkey, is directly to the West, and their other great threat, Iran, is directly to the South. Their other interest for keeping this balance has to do with the Nagorno-Karabakh War, of which I am not going to get into here, except to say that this is an area of armed conflict between Armenia and Azerbaijan due to territorial disputes that began in the late 1980’s (and accounts for the Azeri’s interest in backgrounds). The international community, including the U.S. as an important force for diplomacy, has been working towards a peaceful solution. Some of our outreach programs happened near this region.
Because of this strained government relationship, and given the fact that I was an American (supported by the U.S. Embassy) giving presentations in educational institutions–many of which have teachers and programs with pro-democracy tendencies, you can see the potential here for an explosive situation. This is not Uzbekistan. People were not threatened with prison (or worse) for interacting with me and I was not harassed throughout the country–but the Azeri Government did make some things difficult, including canceling my events at certain music schools, in one case 10 minutes before I was to go on.
What bothers me the most is that the students are the ones who suffer. It’s really ridiculous…when the government actually allows an event to happen (which they closely watch), it occurs to them “oh, it’s only music…they are not criticizing us…no threat”. They seem to forget this from event to event and handle every one on a case-by-case basis. I am not here to start a riot and overthrow your presidency; I am here, as a guest of the U.S. Embassy, to promote American culture and music and to show your students that we care about them and that Americans are in fact kind and friendly people. Period.
Anyways, the events that were successful, were very successful. I have been invited back for an extended stay sometime in the near future. There are many music students who are in dire need of advanced instruction, especially in jazz concepts. I will be returning. And I will work with the students who were denied to me this last time–believe me…
After Azerbaijan, I had the honor of once again being a guest of the Latvian Academy of Music, and was supported by the U.S. Embassy in Riga. I gave a master class to the newly organized Jazz Program at the Academy which was organized by the U.S. Embassy–this was a great experience for me to see the level of jazz musicians here in a former Soviet Country. That evening, I gave a solo concert at the Academy–a concert of ‘me’ this time: I played my composition …no longer to his father…, as well as some jazz improvisations. This was organized by friend and colleague at the Academy, Rolands Kronlaks. I also received an invitation to come back there for an extended visit in the near future. This also appeals to me greatly, especially seeing how I can help positively influence the pedagogy of jazz study in Latvia…very, very appealing…
Until next time,
Demetrius
Baku
Playing for students, Agjabedi
Master class, Baku Music Academy
At Baku Jazz Center
The Caucasus Mountains, Quba
With English teachers and students, Quba
Greetings,
I am pleased to announce that I have been invited to collaborate on projects in Azerbaijan with the Azeri Ministry of Culture, the U.S. Embassy in Baku, and the Peace Corps. This will continue the work that I have been doing for years in the former Soviet Union–bringing American music and stimulating cultural dialogue–as well as connecting to my current project in Tajikistan.
I am also pleased to announce that adding these Azeri projects will not add to my costs, even though I will be traveling and giving concerts and lectures for an extra 10 days; the US Embassy in Baku will cover all expenses, which for an independent artist means a great deal.
And it was actually through my publicizing and promoting this project both through Kickstarter and other on-line sources that the US Embassy in Baku found out about what I was doing–fantastic!!!
Of course, finding ways to get from location to location will be the interesting part…flights are rare, and there will be nothing short of 3 to 4 legs between destinations…I may be traveling via yak and lodging in a yurt, but that’s the fun of it!!!
Again, if you or anyone you know may be interested in supporting my project in creating cultural dialogue and presenting American music to Central Asia, please visit:
http://kck.st/caG86z
More soon!
Demetrius
What If? (60x60x60) up and on-line! March 18, 2010
Greetings,
It is my pleasure to tell you that the NMNMNE’s (New Media New Music New England) project What If? (60x60x60) is now up on-line for public access.
http://www.nmnmne.org/what_if.php
For the project, there was a competition for both composers and film makers to create works of 60 seconds. The idea is that the viewer can choose (or let the website choose at random) any combination of music and video. The website will sync up the two.
My composition, The Ballad of Olga D., was chosen for this project. This was especially fun for me since this piece is the first ever stand-alone electronics-only work that I have ever composed (not counting electronics-only film scores). The one non-electronic component is me speaking the Russian word “Zdravstvuite! (Здравствуите!)”, which means “hello”…you can probably tell by the inflections in my voice what the piece is about (hint: think Russian club scene…).
There are lots of really interesting works that will give you, the viewer, endless hours of random pairing fun!
Thanks again to NMNMNE for putting together this very cool project, and for choosing my work to be a part of it!
Demetrius
